Secret of the Sundrop Alternate Ending
by singertobe
Summary: It was all his fault. The one person who truly cared about him was gone... because of him. (TRIGGER WARNING: Do not read if you struggle with depression and/or suicidal thoughts.)


Hello Tangled fans. I'm a bit new to the fandom but I've quickly become quite obsessed with a certain little alchemist. So far, no Disney character's development has fascinated me more than Varian's. I could go into detail but I think everyone here knows why he's such a fascinating character. One scene of him that constantly replays in my mind is in the season one finale, when he tries to deny that the amber is his fault. I think deep down he knows full well that he's responsible and this is my take on what would happen if he really let it sink in. This is something that I don't think Disney would EVER touch on, but as someone who has gone through a lot of the same emotions Varian has displayed in the show, I sadly think it's something that Varian may have considered. **Trigger warning:** Do not read if you are someone who struggles with depression, self harm, or suicidal thoughts.

With that said, let's begin...

* * *

"I d- I don't understand! Why won't it?!" Varian shouted in despair as he finally gave up, "Her hair, it, it should've cut through it! Why didn't it work?!"

The young alchemist paid no attention to anything around him. Nothing else mattered. His one chance at freeing his father was gone. If Rapunzel's hair couldn't shatter the amber, nothing could.

_"Treason, theft, kidnapping, and violence," _said a small voice in his head, _"You've really outdone yourself this time, Varian. What was that you said the day of the blizzard? You'd save the day? Looks more like you've ruined it for everyone, including your dad!"_

"No," Varian said, trying to hold back tears, "No, I wasn't wrong."

_"Yes you were. You're as dangerous as everyone always thought you were. Your father is gone. He's not coming back and it's all your fault!"_

"Its not my fault," he protested, "None of it is. Its-"

_"Who made the amber?!" _the voice shouted in his mind.

Any words Varian might've been about to say died on his tongue at that moment. As he gazed at the royal family embracing, his arms wrapped around himself, longing to feel that same secure warmth. But that would never happen. His dad, the one person in the entire world who actually cared about him, was gone. He had no real friends. He knew now Rapunzel and her friends had never really cared for him. He was all alone, and it was agonizing.

"Daddy," he whispered as he gazed at his father's frozen form, tears streaming from his eyes.

Varian hunched over, sobbing, feeling like a dagger was being twisted in his heart. He'd been on his own for so long, it physically ached. With each sob he hunched over more, until his vials of chemicals slipped from the chest pocket of his apron. Hearing the clang of glass against wood, he looked towards the vials with misty eyes. Picking one up, he studied it for a moment. He knew it's contents like the back of his hand, and knew very well what it could do if ingested. He looked up at his father one more time.

_"Dad, I'll see you soon."_

"Rapunzel," King Frederic said, "Are you okay?"

The princess looked at her father. "Yes I will be."

Then her gaze turned to Varian, just in time to see him drain the contents of a glass vial.

"Varian?" she asked.

Wiping his tears away, he turned his head towards her. "What? What do you want?"

"Varian, I'm sorry," Rapunzel said, "It never should've come to this."

For a split second, he almost thought her words sincere. But he had no more time to ponder it as a sharp pain made him cry out. His face went white and he curled himself into a fetal position. He had anticipated some discomfort, but not to this level.

_"It'll all be over soon,"_ he assured himself as he moaned.

"Varian?!" Rapunzel said as she got up and ran towards him, his pet raccoon reaching him first, "Varian what's wrong?"

"What do you care?!" he hissed between grit teeth.

"Varian, put our differences aside for a moment and-" Rapunzel was interrupted by a nudge as Ruddiger handed her the now empty vial.

The princess held the vial in her hands and her face paled nearly as white as the alchemist's as she remembered what she just saw.

"Varian!" she shouted, flipping the boy over and holding him in his arms as she shook him, "Varian, look at me! What was in this?!"

Varian tried to push his former friend away, but he found he couldn't as every part of his body began to feel numb.

"MOM! DAD!" Rapunzel shouted, looking to her parents for help.

The king and queen rushed over to the two teenagers. Frederic took the boy's arm, feeling for his pulse.

"This is bad," he said, "He's definitely poisoned himself somehow. He doesn't have much longer."

"Varian, how could you?!" Rapunzel shouted, "What were you thinking?!"

Varian gasped, tears of physical and emotional pain pouring from unnaturally dilated eyes. "I... I don't want to be alone anymore... I don't want to hurt anymore."

"Then don't, Varian," Rapunzel said, tears filling her own eyes, "Stop pushing us away. We can figure this out. I know we can. You don't have to do this alone."

Varian felt the princess' tears fall on his face. _"Why is she crying over me? I'm nothing to her... Aren't I?"_

Ruddiger cooed sadly, curling up on the dying child. Varian had forgotten about him. But maybe Ruddiger was better off without him anyway.

"Please, Varian," Rapunzel begged, now openly sobbing, "Please don't go!"

Looking into those glassy green orbs, the young alchemist now realized the truth. Someone did care, and it only hurt more knowing what he'd done to her. But he just couldn't take the pain anymore. There was only one thing, one person he wanted. And there was only one way of getting there.

"Rapunzel... I'm sorry… It just hurts too much," he whispered as his eyes rolled back in his head and his body went limp.

"Varian! Varian!" the princess shouted as she shook him.

At that moment, Eugene, Cassandra, and Lance all broke into the room, a group of guards not far behind them. They all stopped in shock as they took in the scene.

"What happened?" Eugene asked.

"He's killed himself," Arianna said in tears as her husband wrapped an arm around her.

The three friends gasped, almost in unison, as Eugene walked up to Rapunzel.

"Blondie," he said gently, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Why?" she sobbed, cradling the child like a baby, "Why did it have to come to this?!"

"I'm sorry, Blondie."

Rapunzel looked at Varian's pale, lifeless face, watching her tears fall and mingle with his. It was like Eugene's death all over again... Eugene... Wait a minute...

Stroking the boy's hair she sang a tune she'd known her whole life.

_"Flower gleam and glow_

_Let your powers shine_

_Make the clock reverse_

_Bring back what once was mine"_

An ethereal glow surrounded Varian's body, color slowly returning to his face.

_"Heal what has been hurt_

_Change the fate's design_

_Save what has been lost_

_Bring back what once was mine_

_What once was mine"_

And slowly, the alchemist opened his eyes.

* * *

Please don't hate me for making Varian suffer so much. He's actually my favorite character in the show and I literally wept when this scene first came into my head. But I couldn't possibly bring myself to end him. However, I don't have any ideas for what could happen after this, so this shall remain a oneshot. What happens next is up to you, readers. That said, if you want a happier fanfic, check out my Beauty and the Beast/Cinderella crossover entitled The Royal Line of France. If enough people like it, there will be a sequel that crosses over with the Tangled universe and may or may not include a love interest for Varian. Also, the cover image belongs to my-cove. Check out her work He Needs Me, if you haven't.

And a side note, please, whatever you may be going through, suicide is not the answer. There are always people out there who are willing to help and support you. No matter how hard it gets, I can assure you things will get better. If you or someone you know is struggling with depression, please seek help. Don't keep something like this to yourself.

I hope you all enjoyed. And here's hoping to an awesome 3rd season.


End file.
